


Clair de Lune

by reaperlight



Category: Death Note
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Alternate Character Interpretation, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Apple Shortages, Bisexual Male Character, Drama, Gender Dysphoria, Immortals, Internalization, Intersex, Interspecies Relationship(s), Kink Meme, Misgendering, Misogyny, Multi, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Prompt Fic, Sexual Fantasy, Shinigami, Showers, Trans Light, Trans Male Character, Tsundere Light, Video & Computer Games, Villains, Wordcount: 1.000-3.000
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-25
Updated: 2015-03-25
Packaged: 2018-03-19 13:25:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3611664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/reaperlight/pseuds/reaperlight
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was hardly an earth-shattering revelation. Shinigami didn’t make nearly as big a deal about gender roles as humans did.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Clair de Lune

**Author's Note:**

> Kink meme prompt: http://dn-kink2.livejournal.com/1491.html?thread=2168275#t2168275  
> "Any two males, excluding Mello, one of them is FTM."

_However did I ever get so lucky?_

Ryuk reclined on the nice, soft bed—Light was a good host, the epitome of manners and let his otherworldly guest make use of it whenever he wasn’t using it. It beat out even the dust piles of the Shinigami realm—that was for sure. The Shinigami partook of the big basket of apples his human had left for him on the nightstand. His _favorite._

_Oh Light._ Ryuk thought giddily as he remembered the looks of terror and betrayal on the face of Light’s latest victim. Naomi Misora trusted the wrong human. Yes, even Ryuk could see that was a bit fucked up but knowing what kind of person Light was he couldn’t help but find the whole situation kind of funny. He wondered if Misora was right, if L really was ‘just like Light.’ If so he was sure that he was in for quite a ride. 

Ryuk guffawed again at his ridiculous "Prince Charming." He _really_ didn’t like women very much, did he? Well, Light didn’t seem to like most humans but he seemed to hold a special disdain for girls. Ryuk idly wondered at the cause. Was he stood up on a date or something? Was he pushed into the sandbox? Did his little sister get all the attention? Did some chick beat his test score? Was he secretly gay or something and insecure about his sexuality? It didn’t really matter. The gist of it was that Light hated girls yet he attracted scores of them without even trying and that in itself was hilarious to the Shinigami. 

_Oh Light._ He was oh so smart, so… _pretty._ And damn if he made a better Shinigami than any of the assholes back home. Dammit, why couldn’t _Light_ be his gambling partner and Gukku or Deridovely be his lifespan chow? 

It wasn’t fair. 

The Shinigami's idle cackling abruptly trailed off when the realization hit. 

Ryuk cursed. 

He was in _love._

He was in love with his _human._

That was probably the worst possible state for a Shinigami to be in and Ryuk had seen firsthand what Light did to the people he had charmed. He wasn’t interested in being turned into another of Light’s tools let alone dying for the brat. Ryuk cursed again and immediately crushed the feelings down with the cold reminder that Light was lifespan chow, very entertaining lifespan chow maybe, but nothing more. 

Apples! That's what he needed. More apples. Apples were good. Apples were safe. Apples could take his mind off of anything... 

Ryuk idly reached over to the apple basket to find it empty. 

**“We’re out of apples,”** Ryuk said aloud in utter disbelief. It had been a huge pile and now it was gone. Even Ryuk couldn’t believe they had all disappeared so fast. Where did they go? He certainly didn’t remember eating them all… 

**"Why are the apples gone?"** Ryuk groaned aloud in dismay. **“Hey Light…?”** the Shinigami began before realizing that he was addressing an empty room. 

Oh… right. Light said something about going to take a shower. On the whole Ryuk tried to respect his human’s privacy, normally he would have _never_ have bothered him in the shower but then, the apples were _gone._ This was an _emergency._ Surely Light would understand. 

The Shinigami drifted in through the bathroom wall. 

Ryuk took a moment to just enjoy the steam. The Shinigami realm was a very dry place—you could even say _bone dry_ —and Ryuk found he rather liked juicy things. Apples. Steam… Light, cheeks flushed pink, hair matted, skin sweaty from exertion as he stayed up late, writing page after page in the notebook with zealous fervor until he was too physically exhausted to write anymore. He’d write until his hand shook and got blisters. Despite keeping a rigid sleep schedule for himself, Ryuk knew Light would probably keep writing all night if he thought he could get away with it. On occasion Ryuk would be the one to gently remind him he had class in the morning on the pretext that watching him sleep through his classes would be pretty boring. 

Ryuk took in another deep whiff of the steam enjoying the scents of the shampoo and his human’s natural smells—Ryuk found it to be a pleasant scent, almost reminiscent of a heavily spiced apple pie.

 **“Light?”** Ryuk called again but got no response. Either Light couldn’t hear him over the roar of the water or he was pretending not to hear him. 

Ryuk’s first impulse was to just barge in and tell Light about his apple emergency but now that he actually thought about it he didn’t think that would get him a very favorable response. Ryuk groaned. Though he was a bit curious to see what Light looked like without the clothes on and wondered how he might compare to him he was trying not to perv on his… friend if for no other reason than that was the exact opposite of what he _should_ be doing with his human. The Shinigami sighed. There was nothing for it but to wait.

Ryuk went off to float in the corner and sulk, wistfully taking in another whiff of the steam. Ryuk didn’t even need to breathe—just like his apples such an activity was purely recreational. Ryuk found that Light’s scent was doing strange things to him, he found it far more intoxicating than his apples and it somehow induced an uncomfortable stirring in his nether regions. 

_Goddammit, Light._

This was overall a bad idea. 

Ryuk was again imagining barging in on Light, only instead of demanding apples he would press his human’s smaller body up against the wall and pound him until he couldn’t remember his own name. He should leave before he acted on it. Light was not for him. He understood that. In fact Light would no doubt be appalled at the nature of his fantasies. Ryuk had just turned to leave when a loud, high-pitched whine pricked his ears. 

Ryuk turned back to regard the closed shower curtain. Just what was going on in there? Was he hurt? As Ryuk drew closer he began picking up more of those little whimpers and cries. Ryuk assumed he was in pain. Nothing could have prepared him for what he found on the other side of the curtain. At first Ryuk had thought he had walked in on a stranger. There was a strange woman in the shower. A strange woman who was having a, uh… _private moment._ This thoroughly confused Ryuk because he _smelled_ Light, in fact Light’s scent here was the strongest he’d ever caught it. Ryuk continued to stare in shock as he subconsciously took inventory: large breasts, wide hips, auburn brown hair that fell just to the nape of her neck, and a fine, tight ass just like… 

**_“Light?!”_ **

The not-so-strange girl yelped and jumped about a foot in the air, like a cat trying to jump out of its skin.

“R-Ryuk?! What the hell are you doing in here?!” Light demanded (not _shrieked,_ definitely not shrieked, _demanded_ ) near hysterically. 

It took a while for Ryuk to respond—he was still processing the fact that Light was _all woman._

**“You’re a gi—?!”** Ryuk began stupidly, black taloned hands halfway to touching one of the prominent fleshy mounds on Light’s chest before he caught sight of his… _her(?!)_ murderous glare and thought better of it. 

“If you ever want to see an apple again you will not finish that sentence,” Light hissed dangerously. 

Ryuk shut his trap. 

“I’ll ask again, why are you here?” Light demanded, hands on her (his?!) hip in an aggressive stance. 

**“Um… well, we’re out of apples.”**

Light’s glare became impossibly more homicidal than before. 

**“Er… Sorry? I wasn’t going to walk in on you, I swear! But then I heard you, uh… crying. I thought you were injured.”**

“So? What did you intend to do about it, Shinigami? Come to laugh at me if I was?”

 **“I-I don’t know. You know I’m not on your side but I do like you. I guess it depends on the nature of the injury and how nice you are to me. I suppose I could either find some way to get another human to notice you were hurt… or put you out of your misery.”**

Light snorted. “You’re a true friend, Ryuk.”

 **“Thanks,”** Ryuk replied, completely missing the sarcasm. **“I like, really like you too. You’re a really cool human. And I’m really sorry, Light. About all this. I’ll just… go.”**

“And just where do you think you’re going?” 

Ryuk froze in mid-step as he attempted to retreat through the wall. 

**“I uh, I didn’t mean to walk in on you, Light. I’m just… trying to preserve your modesty.”**

Light snorted again. “A little late for that, don’t you think?” 

**“Sorry. It’s just I get a little shy around gi—uh… right.”**

“Do you like what you see? Did it _entertain_ you, Ryuk?”

 **“Er… yeah?”** Ryuk admitted guilelessly his gaze once again locking on his human’s naked form. 

Ryuk thought it looked even better as Light’s bare skin turned that brilliant shade of red. 

“Ryuk, please don’t look at me like this,” Light ordered but Ryuk noticed how her… his _HIS_ anger failed to completely mask the hurt.

 **“S-sorry.”** Ryuk swallowed harshly and forcefully averted his eyes. **“I’m sorry, Light. I’m just surprised, is all. I would never have guessed… you’re a uh… right.”** The Shinigami shrunk under the weight of Light’s murderous glare. **“Uh, right… sorry, buddy.”**

“Let me make one thing clear. I am a _boy,_ Ryuk. A weak and ugly boy, maybe, but a boy nonetheless. I’m a _boy._ I just happened to be born with the wrong body, that's all.”

**“I don’t think you’re weak or ugly, Light. In fact I think you’re very pretty, er… _handsome._ Whatever! You’re a really good-looking human!”**

“And you are an ugly ass monster.” 

**“Yeah…”** Ryuk laughed in a self-deprecating way but declared it a mental success that he got Light to crack a smile. Ryuk was just glad Light was feeling more like himself again. He didn’t even mind when Light insulted him—he always admired that Light had the courage to give him a hard time. It got so _boring_ when humans were afraid of him all the time. **“I really am sorry about this, Light. I’ve always tried to let you have your privacy.”**

Light just sighed as he reached for his clothes. “I suppose it’s too much to ask that you forget about having seen this and pretend that this does not change anything between us? _Please,_ Ryuk. Don’t treat me any different.” 

**“Okay,”** said Ryuk, not sure what else to say. **“Sure, Light. I mean, it hardly matters to me what fleshy bits you have. You’re still my human.”**

Of course things _had_ changed. Because while Ryuk knew Light kept secrets well he hadn’t quite realized that that meant Light could and did keep secrets even from him. But then this was hardly an earth-shattering revelation. Shinigami didn’t make nearly as big a deal about gender roles as humans did. Ryuk knew Shinigami females were quite tough in a crisis and in the Shinigami realm females held some of the highest positions of power in the land. 

And as for Light, well, _HE_ was still the bold and manipulative, lovable bastard he had always known. Ryuk held a high respect for his cunning little human even if he was, ultimately, lifespan chow—so he would try to respect his wishes on the matter for Light’s sake. 

**“Sure… buddy. Er… uh… do you want to play some video games? Mario Golf?”**

Ryuk suggested as he tried to avert his eyes again but inevitably ended up taking a peak when Light bent over to put on her… _HIS_ trousers. 

Light actually smiled at him. “Thanks Ryuk—that would be great.”

Ryuk swallowed again and fidgeted awkwardly. Unfortunately this discovery made little difference to his recently discovered attraction to the teen—Ryuk had found himself attracted to both males and females (and of either species) over his long, immortal life time. Maybe it was masochism—he certainly loved torturing himself with things he could never have.

Ryuk’s wandering eye once again landed on Light’s breasts. The Shinigami watched in fascination as Light got dressed. Light was quite well endowed—easily a C-cup, almost a handful if he were to reach out and grab it (no, bad Shinigami, don't even go there!)—but his chest disappeared beneath the binder and the layers of his padded suit. 

**“Doesn’t that hurt?”**

Light grunted. “You get used to it.” 

***

Light sighed as he felt Ryuk’s side-long glances as they mashed buttons together. 

“Alright. Fine. Go on. I know you’re _dying_ to ask…” 

**“So were you uh, born a girl?”**

“Actually I wasn’t born as either but… somewhere in between. My chromosomes say male but my body didn’t get the message. I had a penis. It was just, like… really small. They had it surgically removed to make me more “normal,” the teen explained bitterly.

Ryuk winced and crossed his legs. **“Ouch.”**

“I wasn’t aware during it. I’ve never known it. It’s just… I know what I _should_ have had. I’m not a girl. My parents decided I would be a girl because I would grow these goddamn _meat sacks_ when I was older but I’ve always known I’m a boy.” 

**“No, Light. You’re not a boy.”**

Light glared furiously up at the Shinigami’s grinning face and lamp-like crimson eyes. 

**“You’re a _man._ And a really princely one at that. I’ve always admired you, Light. You’re so _brave._ You really should have been born like a thousand years ago. I bet you would have been emperor!”**

Light laughed bitterly, “With this body? If I was born a thousand years ago I would have been killed or forced into slavery for being abnormal.” 

**“Even with that body I think you still could have reigned… and if you had me there would be no doubt. You really do deserve a throne.”**

Light laughed again, more easily this time. Ryuk found it was like music to his ears. 

“Why settle for emperor when I can be God?” 

**“Good point,”** Ryuk cackled with him.

*** 

Things did change after that but that wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. 

Ryuk made it a point to use male pronouns in regards to Light even when Light had the binder off and Light unconsciously rewarded him with warmer smiles and better apples.

Light no longer tried to hide under the blankets when he changed for school every morning—there was little point now. He took the binder off more often when he was alone in his room with Ryuk—apparently it was quite painful to wear for hours on end as he had been doing.

Ryuk really wished he could have told him it was okay—that he didn’t need to do that just to impress him—he already did. Ryuk knew he could live another two thousand years and never meet another human as impressive as Light. Of course Ryuk doubted Light would have listened to him anyway—Light could be stubborn like that. Really, that’s what he loved about his human and while at times Light could be difficult and domineering and withholding of his apples Ryuk wouldn’t have him any other way.


End file.
